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A time to vent
2001-05-19 - 9:39 a.m.

Geez...

Yesterday Chris graduated, and I didn't.

It's funny how we started out together in the same classes, for the same degree, and I end up dropping out and he goes on to graduate.

Not that I quit, mind you; but it's so hard to work full time and take care of a disabled mom and go through an accelerated study program, AND still have enough for tuition after all the bills are paid...

Or am I just coming up with excuses to make myself feel better...?

It just felt so weird being back in that building, with all those people, and seeing the work that they accomplished and that I didn't.

You people don't have to shake my hand and smile at me when I know you're thinking in the back of your mind that I'm a quitter!

...and mom's back in the hospital again for a second stroke, and I come home to find out that dad has to have surgery next week (on my birthday... go figure...), and the fucking collection guy wants his goddamn money, and etc., and etc....

FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK!

One thing's for certain-- although I haven't quite yet hit rock bottom (although it sure as hell feels like it!), there is no other way to go but up.

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