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What the hell...
2001-08-02 - 5:03 p.m.

Fuck. Had another cigarette again. I know, I know. I suck at self-control, but then if I didn't, what would be the risk of living? I like taking risks, although one stroke is good enough for me, thank you very much.

My left hand is still going numb once in a while, it's a good reminder for me to take my heart medicine. My left foot is still hurting; someone told me that constant pain like that for the time that I've been hurting (what's it been now, a little over a month?)could be a sign of diabetes... hmmmmmm...

Just another fault of yours truly; I'll just add it to the list.

Paul Anka is on TV singing "My Way". Some people may argue that is a Frank Sinatra tune, but I know for a fact that is an original Paul Anka tune...

A thought keeps running through my mind, yet I don't know why I keep thinking it-- if you died right now, would you want to know who would show up to your funeral? I hope to God that a whole shitload of people show up; or at least five people. Making a difference in one person's life is all good, but making a difference in at least five people's lives is better...

PG&E shut our power off today. I totally forgot to pay the bill; and now that I've payed the bill and they've restored the power, they want us to pay a security deposit of $500. What the hell? It's not like I'm renting a $40,000 car and there's a possibility that I can run off to Mexico with it, it's fucking gas and electricity, goddammit! Just because I forgot to pay one bill I'm now blacklisted. What-the-fuck-ever. Actually it's my dad who will be blacklisted, 'cause the bill is in his name and I just pay the damn thing for them.

Isn't it a monopoly when there is only one company that controls a certain asset and there is no other competition? I thought that kind of shit was illegal..

Finally got the lien release on my motorcycle; but no title. I went to the DMV and now their saying that they can't find any records of my bike existing in California... so I guess what they're telling me is that my bike is a figment of my imagination? I suppose that all those times other drivers almost hit me and Kwasi crashing it into a wall were figments of my imagination also...

I swear to God there's a conspiracy against me. LOL

Bought some Krispy Kremes last night, but for some reason I can't get into them like normal... I guess all that guilt-trip shit that the doctor told me is working on me. Hmmmmmm...

Hey, would ya mind doing me a favor? If you're reading this, I'd like to know who you are. Sign my guestbook, would ya? Bitch me out, say I suck, give me a compliment, correct my grammar, or just say "hi". Thanks!

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