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spare me the sympathy
09.23.2001 - 10:48 PM

This is the land of opportunity, right? The land where you're supposed to reach for the stars and where you can follow your dreams and make them come true, right?

... yeah fucking right.

I dare ANYONE to prove me wrong and help me make my dreams come true-- except for the dream that I had the other night of course.

Some people are telling me that I'm in a state of denial and that I'm just not willing to accept everything that's been happening to me. You know what? Maybe I am, so what the fuck. So NOW I have people that give a shit? After all these years of putting everyone else first ahead of myself, people are worrying about what I eat, or how much I eat, or if I have a cigarette or whatever? Where were they when I needed them last week? or last month? or for that matter, last year or even yesterday? Where were they when I came home after having comforted them when they were sad or depressed or when their boyfriends or girlfriends were cheating on them and they had nobody else to call? Where were they when I had my stroke and I still went back to work that night and the next day with the left side of my body still numb? Where were they all those nights when I cried myself to sleep wondering about not being good enough for her, or her, or her ?

And now I'm getting told, "I'm worried about you."

Fucking puhleeze.� Spare me the fucking sympathy.

I'm losing faith. Fuck it all.

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